Took the GRE this morning, for sure bombed and am now a little bit bummed about the whole thing. Here is what bugs me: none of the words that were on the test where words that I have EVER encountered in my academic or professional life. I have not taken a math class since I was a freshman (which was 3 years ago) and why would I? I'm a comparative cultures and politics major!! The crazy liberal extremist/ conspiracy theorist in me would like to say that this is a ploy to get me to sign up for more classes that have nothing to do with my passions in life, which would make the college more money. Or so that companies like Kaplan (and I am not bashing this company but the system...especially since I use their products) can make a billion dollars off of me having to take their class in order to pass this stupid test.
Let me write a "heartfelt" apology that I knew what my passions were the second I stepped out of my high school and that I have never once doubted the major I am currently fulfilling at my university. Let me then apologize for not taking unnecessary classes so that I can be a "well rounded individual" when I know what I want to do with my life. I am well rounded, but that doesn't mean that I can answer a question involving what would happen if you rotated figure A around point B and then flipped it on its plane.
Here is what I can do: talk about Turkish politics, make a homemade veggie burger, live in a house with 27 other individuals, unclog a toilet, organize transportation for a group of individuals, get up every morning Monday-Saturday at 5:30am, back up an argument and then beat you over the head with it, communicate with non-english speakers, I can listen to hours to your heartbreaking story of how your boyfriend cheated on you with the girl next door, I can walk you home when you are drunk off your butt, I give a mean back rub, I write amazing love notes. I can laugh, I can cry, I can sing and dance and play on the swings like a two year old.
All of these are more important to me than know how to calculate the square root of the train traveling to Alabama at 60 gigahertz per half second. And if you think I am wrong...I don't really give two hoots!
With love always,
This Singing Ginger
Monday, November 1, 2010
Monday, October 18, 2010
Nightly Pondering
I don't know why the evening brings such a weird feeling of loneliness. Especially when I see no logical reason to be lonely. I have had a pretty good day, it was even accented with some truly beautiful moments. My boyfriend made me soup today, and set it on my bed for when I got home because he knew I was feeling kinda crappy. I got some work done, I got a great grade back on a paper, I had a nice dinner, there is no possible reason for me to be feeling anything other than fabulous...and yet, I do not.
Its odd, that emotion can be so illogical. That happiness could be prevented with something as trifling as hormones. I sitting here and watch "Last Tango in Paris" which I am sure does not help the situation, since the movie is essentially a cluster F#@* of emotions. Marlon Brando is fabulous though. It is such an odd thing.
Okay I think that is going to be it for the night. Hope to see you all soon
~The Singing Ginger
Its odd, that emotion can be so illogical. That happiness could be prevented with something as trifling as hormones. I sitting here and watch "Last Tango in Paris" which I am sure does not help the situation, since the movie is essentially a cluster F#@* of emotions. Marlon Brando is fabulous though. It is such an odd thing.
Okay I think that is going to be it for the night. Hope to see you all soon
~The Singing Ginger
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
Last 72 Entry
If you want an explanation, read the post below this one. :)
My last 72 hours would come in 3-24hour stages. It would mean dealing with the future that my family is facing without me, enjoying our shared current present, and reconciling my future without them. I really do believe I could leave this earth relatively content knowing that those three things had been accomplished. A good friend of mine, who died of cancer when I was a senior in high school, told me a few weeks before she passed: “My part is easy, all I have to do is die; the hard thing is being around after I am gone.”
My first 24 hours would be leaving something to help my family and loved ones deal with the future they are facing without me. I have always loved to sing; since I was little music was something that has meant the world to me. Because of my passion, and because they don’t mind listening, big family gatherings are often marked with the talents of the younger generation. I sing, my brother plays cello, my sister dances and the cousins perform any number of talents. Though I was on a few tracks as a high schooler, I have never had any sort of solo recordings of my voice. I had always thought it would be nice to have at least one to listen to when I am old and can no longer produce sound the way I do now. Since I am not making it to “old” I would leave it for those that will.
My first 24 hours would be spent attempting to round up as many friends and family members as I could and cutting a CD. There would be a track for my brother to play cello accompaniment on, one with my sister and I giggling some random song we love to dance to, my cousin accompanying me on the guitar, and my mother, grandmother and I doing a trio (we are the only 3 generational family that sing at our church.) I would also do the solo songs that I know each family member loves to hear, and dedicate them to those that aren’t exactly “musically inclined.” At the end I would put a hidden track with a message to my family and friends about how much they mean to me, and that my life, though now cut short, has never been anything less than full because of them.
This disk would be my attempt to live on in a way I know they enjoy, as well as one they could remember me being passionate about.
My second 24 hours would be dealing with the shared current present that I am living right now with the people I love. If I’m going out, I’m going out with a party. My friend was able to help plan her funeral, and though I would probably take out an hour of my last 72 to deal with that type of stuff, it isn’t something I would want to spend a lot of time doing. My Greek and Swedish heritage on my Father’s side as well as the general Irish Catholic nature of my Mother’s side would first dictate that there be immense amounts of food that have to be prepared over the course of the day.
I would get once last chance to cook in the kitchen where I grew up with my mother and sister, one last chance to tell my brother to stop licking spoons, one last chance to blare music and tell my dad to get his butt into the kitchen and help out. There would be every kind of everything that I love to eat. My
Mother makes AMAZING pesto sauce from basil in her garden, which would be matched up with my Farmour’s hand rolled (by myself and younger siblings of course) Swedish meatballs, and spinach pie made by my Papou’s wife. Dad would do something on the grill, my Grandy LaVonne has a recipe for cranberry fluff that my sister loves to make, my Aunt Beth does pie the way some people do religion, my Uncle Paul whips up a mean bread pudding, my Aunt Bridget always brings amazing cheese, and my Aunt Martha would do something she saw on the food network. Everyone would be responsible for bringing “their dish”, the one that they feel best represents what they have contributed to my culinary existence. Everyone (including friends) would be welcome, but all must bring something to the table.
To be honest this party wouldn’t really be about the actual eating itself but everything that comes before it. The Holiday’s are not marked by the lifting of a fork to a mouth, but by what goes on in the kitchen, and the conversation that is had over the meal. My Uncle Paul argues politics around in circles unless he is talking to my Mom who knows how to debate him, my cousin Alex is slowly picking up the talent as well. My younger cousins attempt to stick around for “adult conversation” but peace out once their plates are clear only to magically reappear once dessert is served. My Grandpa Gayl has to sit next to my Grandmother and will take any opportunity to raise a very long toast in her name… and then again in the name of the family… and then again to the goodness of his life; they only get longer with each glass of wine. My boyfriend would sit quietly until someone brought up theoretical physics or skateboarding at which point he would jump into the conversation with much gusto. My Papou (grandfather in Greek) sits at the head of the table and asks how the education is going for each of his grandchildren in turn. My Uncle Peter and Aunt Dara don’t get along with Papou, but they would for me. In the meantime my Aunt Dara would ask about boys, and beer and parties. I would talk with everyone, until someone asked me to sing, probably right after dessert. Food, in my family, is really just an excuse.
The last 24 hours of my life on this earth would be spent solely with my immediate family. I love my boyfriend, I love my best friends, but family is family and there is no getting around that. I’m not married, and I wouldn’t have a chance to start my own, so they are all that I have in the world that is important. This last bit would be squaring away my own future that no longer includes the world I now live in. I was born and raised Catholic and still consider myself to be one, but the spirituality of all creation has always been something that has brought me peace. I’m reading the Qu’ran, I have been to temple, and though my place of worship is in a church, I’ve worshipped in a mosque, and in the forest, and under the stars. My God’s church is the world and so where I am, there too He will be. I would like to receive last rites, I would like to spend a moment of time alone in the sanctuary. This is the same church my siblings and I were baptized in, the same one my Grandmother was married in, and the same one where my Father married my Mother.
I would have a conversation with God, I would cry, and I would laugh, and I would square away all things that have been neglected or left undone between us. The conversation would end with an “Amen” and a “see you soon.”
There wouldn’t be much alone time after that. Every moment would be spent telling my family everything that I’ve been telling them all my life. My family has never been short on I love you’s. I am confident that if I died today while writing this contest entry in the Library of Michigan State University
that each and every family member I have would know that I loved them. Phone conversations, and good bye’s always end with those words, and so chances are, “I love you” would be the last words I had to any given family member. It would be more about telling them the WHY behind my love. Sure, my Mother is my Mother, and so therefore I love her in a certain way “just because”, but I’ve had 21 years of amazing life to build up the love for the four other individuals that make up my family beyond what their relationship to myself might mandate. On top of the conversations we would be having I would leave each of them a letter to open only after I had passed; something physical to look back on when they needed. The night would end on the couch, watching a movie, with my Mother rubbing my back and my dad peeling oranges for the rest of us.
There it is; no big trips, no crazy reconciliations, no emotional confessions and no regrets about how I lived my life.
My last 72 hours would come in 3-24hour stages. It would mean dealing with the future that my family is facing without me, enjoying our shared current present, and reconciling my future without them. I really do believe I could leave this earth relatively content knowing that those three things had been accomplished. A good friend of mine, who died of cancer when I was a senior in high school, told me a few weeks before she passed: “My part is easy, all I have to do is die; the hard thing is being around after I am gone.”
My first 24 hours would be leaving something to help my family and loved ones deal with the future they are facing without me. I have always loved to sing; since I was little music was something that has meant the world to me. Because of my passion, and because they don’t mind listening, big family gatherings are often marked with the talents of the younger generation. I sing, my brother plays cello, my sister dances and the cousins perform any number of talents. Though I was on a few tracks as a high schooler, I have never had any sort of solo recordings of my voice. I had always thought it would be nice to have at least one to listen to when I am old and can no longer produce sound the way I do now. Since I am not making it to “old” I would leave it for those that will.
My first 24 hours would be spent attempting to round up as many friends and family members as I could and cutting a CD. There would be a track for my brother to play cello accompaniment on, one with my sister and I giggling some random song we love to dance to, my cousin accompanying me on the guitar, and my mother, grandmother and I doing a trio (we are the only 3 generational family that sing at our church.) I would also do the solo songs that I know each family member loves to hear, and dedicate them to those that aren’t exactly “musically inclined.” At the end I would put a hidden track with a message to my family and friends about how much they mean to me, and that my life, though now cut short, has never been anything less than full because of them.
This disk would be my attempt to live on in a way I know they enjoy, as well as one they could remember me being passionate about.
My second 24 hours would be dealing with the shared current present that I am living right now with the people I love. If I’m going out, I’m going out with a party. My friend was able to help plan her funeral, and though I would probably take out an hour of my last 72 to deal with that type of stuff, it isn’t something I would want to spend a lot of time doing. My Greek and Swedish heritage on my Father’s side as well as the general Irish Catholic nature of my Mother’s side would first dictate that there be immense amounts of food that have to be prepared over the course of the day.
I would get once last chance to cook in the kitchen where I grew up with my mother and sister, one last chance to tell my brother to stop licking spoons, one last chance to blare music and tell my dad to get his butt into the kitchen and help out. There would be every kind of everything that I love to eat. My
Mother makes AMAZING pesto sauce from basil in her garden, which would be matched up with my Farmour’s hand rolled (by myself and younger siblings of course) Swedish meatballs, and spinach pie made by my Papou’s wife. Dad would do something on the grill, my Grandy LaVonne has a recipe for cranberry fluff that my sister loves to make, my Aunt Beth does pie the way some people do religion, my Uncle Paul whips up a mean bread pudding, my Aunt Bridget always brings amazing cheese, and my Aunt Martha would do something she saw on the food network. Everyone would be responsible for bringing “their dish”, the one that they feel best represents what they have contributed to my culinary existence. Everyone (including friends) would be welcome, but all must bring something to the table.
To be honest this party wouldn’t really be about the actual eating itself but everything that comes before it. The Holiday’s are not marked by the lifting of a fork to a mouth, but by what goes on in the kitchen, and the conversation that is had over the meal. My Uncle Paul argues politics around in circles unless he is talking to my Mom who knows how to debate him, my cousin Alex is slowly picking up the talent as well. My younger cousins attempt to stick around for “adult conversation” but peace out once their plates are clear only to magically reappear once dessert is served. My Grandpa Gayl has to sit next to my Grandmother and will take any opportunity to raise a very long toast in her name… and then again in the name of the family… and then again to the goodness of his life; they only get longer with each glass of wine. My boyfriend would sit quietly until someone brought up theoretical physics or skateboarding at which point he would jump into the conversation with much gusto. My Papou (grandfather in Greek) sits at the head of the table and asks how the education is going for each of his grandchildren in turn. My Uncle Peter and Aunt Dara don’t get along with Papou, but they would for me. In the meantime my Aunt Dara would ask about boys, and beer and parties. I would talk with everyone, until someone asked me to sing, probably right after dessert. Food, in my family, is really just an excuse.
The last 24 hours of my life on this earth would be spent solely with my immediate family. I love my boyfriend, I love my best friends, but family is family and there is no getting around that. I’m not married, and I wouldn’t have a chance to start my own, so they are all that I have in the world that is important. This last bit would be squaring away my own future that no longer includes the world I now live in. I was born and raised Catholic and still consider myself to be one, but the spirituality of all creation has always been something that has brought me peace. I’m reading the Qu’ran, I have been to temple, and though my place of worship is in a church, I’ve worshipped in a mosque, and in the forest, and under the stars. My God’s church is the world and so where I am, there too He will be. I would like to receive last rites, I would like to spend a moment of time alone in the sanctuary. This is the same church my siblings and I were baptized in, the same one my Grandmother was married in, and the same one where my Father married my Mother.
I would have a conversation with God, I would cry, and I would laugh, and I would square away all things that have been neglected or left undone between us. The conversation would end with an “Amen” and a “see you soon.”
There wouldn’t be much alone time after that. Every moment would be spent telling my family everything that I’ve been telling them all my life. My family has never been short on I love you’s. I am confident that if I died today while writing this contest entry in the Library of Michigan State University
that each and every family member I have would know that I loved them. Phone conversations, and good bye’s always end with those words, and so chances are, “I love you” would be the last words I had to any given family member. It would be more about telling them the WHY behind my love. Sure, my Mother is my Mother, and so therefore I love her in a certain way “just because”, but I’ve had 21 years of amazing life to build up the love for the four other individuals that make up my family beyond what their relationship to myself might mandate. On top of the conversations we would be having I would leave each of them a letter to open only after I had passed; something physical to look back on when they needed. The night would end on the couch, watching a movie, with my Mother rubbing my back and my dad peeling oranges for the rest of us.
There it is; no big trips, no crazy reconciliations, no emotional confessions and no regrets about how I lived my life.
Life as a Senior
Attempting to maybe get back into writing on this a bit more. Going to *copy/paste* two documents on here. One is the update I sent out to my family a week or so ago telling them about all the new news I have had during the beginning of the year. the other one is my submission to a writing competition called "Last 72 Contest." It involves writing about what you would do with your last 72 hours on earth and why. The top 13 get to be on a TV show, and the top 3 get cash prizes. I figure one is a good update on life and the other is the super personal side of things that I occasionally feel like sharing with anybody that cares to read. :)
p.s. if you are reading this and have your own blog (Andrew K) post and let me know what it is so I can start reading it!!!
Merhaba Family!
Now that I have gotten settled in with life and my last year of school I thought it might be high time to let you all know what is going on in life, because I know how all of you wait with baited breath for these e-mails. :)
I successfully moved into the Phoenix Student Cooperative about two weeks ago and, for the most part have been enjoying the lifestyle. If ever there was a place to pretend like you are living in the 1960's this would be it. I came to the house to find a full color portrait of Bob Dylan painted on my door, which is part of a hallway that has a giant, trippy mural floor to ceiling. For those of you unfamiliar with the CoOp system, my house holds 29 people (including myself) in both single and double rooms. Each person in the house has weekly chores they must complete on pain of fining, and that is how the house is kept clean, and functioning. Each week I get 3 dinners provided by a team of student cooks that live in the house (students can sign up for a cook position as part of their duties to the house) and I also have access to the "House Pantry" which comes stocked with general food items: peanut butter, jelly, milk, cereal, pasta, sandwich meats, cheese, fruit, veggies and condiments. When I sign over my rent check it isn't to some crazy landlord or a reality company but to a group of students that run the system. I get all of these wonderful things for about $1,500 cheaper per year than I did last year, and would HIGHLY suggest to any college goers that you look into your local CoOp systems, it is a wonderful way to live, and you meet so many fabulous new and different people.
Classes are far and away the most enjoyable ones I have had throughout my college career, it pays to be senior that is for sure. None of them start before 12pm (go ahead and call me lazy, I'm still waking up at 5:45am every day for rowing) and I have no Friday classes. My Senior Seminar is my most interesting course currently. A Senior Seminar is a James Madison capstone class that requires you to come up with original paper topic ideas with the semi-hope you might get published. I was originally signed up for a Sem about Cuba and Haiti but decided that, as wonderful as those two countries are, I have little to no interest in them. I asked my former Jews and Anti-Semitism Professor if there was anyway he would let me into his class and then tweak it a bit to fit my major (his Senior Seminar is for Social Relations and Policy people) and he agreed. I got the appropriate overrides and I'm now studying Social Relations within Nazi Concentration Camps. As bleak as it sounds, I find this topic terribly interesting and think it will serve me well if I am ever doing work with Humanitarian Aid or Genocide prevention groups. I also love my Professor and he has agreed to help me get published at the end of the year if I put a lot of work into it.
My next most interesting class would be Turkish. Thats right folks, I took my insane love of Turkey one step farther and am now learning the language (in case you hadn't picked it up with the greeting this email starts out with.) At this point I know the alphabet, numbers 1-40, days of the week, months of the year, and a super basic greeting conversation. My graduate student teacher is from Istanbul and can be a little hard to understand at times but since the class is only 6 people large I don't have a problem getting questions answered. :)
Next most important class would be my Islamic Empires class which is within the History Department and is teaching me the basis of Islam and the reigning empire from the 14th century through the 19th century. With my luck and some sort of divine providence my Professor is Turkish and would love nothing better than to hook me up with scholarships, and conversation groups in Turkish. She is a wonderful lady and I am looking forward to having a much better understanding of Islam at the end of the class. It is helpful that I am also reading the Qu'ran alongside the required course material. Fear not Grandma, I have no intention of converting anytime soon, but find that people are most scared of what they do not know, and I don't plan on being a cowardly person if I can help it.
I am also taking a voice class on the side for fun, but probably wont write much about it since it is super basic and not really worth noting. Might mean some classic performances for people around New Year's and Christmas. :)
The year is certainly starting off with a bang and I would have it no other way. I'm dealing with Graduate school applications as well as looking for a summer internship in a Human Rights group, or with the State Department (if anyone has any connections and wants to help me out, please let me know!) All in all the motto of the year is: productivity or die. Its going to be a good time :)
Hoşçakal! (H-oh-sh-ch-ah-kal)
Love, Claire
p.s. if you are reading this and have your own blog (Andrew K) post and let me know what it is so I can start reading it!!!
Merhaba Family!
Now that I have gotten settled in with life and my last year of school I thought it might be high time to let you all know what is going on in life, because I know how all of you wait with baited breath for these e-mails. :)
I successfully moved into the Phoenix Student Cooperative about two weeks ago and, for the most part have been enjoying the lifestyle. If ever there was a place to pretend like you are living in the 1960's this would be it. I came to the house to find a full color portrait of Bob Dylan painted on my door, which is part of a hallway that has a giant, trippy mural floor to ceiling. For those of you unfamiliar with the CoOp system, my house holds 29 people (including myself) in both single and double rooms. Each person in the house has weekly chores they must complete on pain of fining, and that is how the house is kept clean, and functioning. Each week I get 3 dinners provided by a team of student cooks that live in the house (students can sign up for a cook position as part of their duties to the house) and I also have access to the "House Pantry" which comes stocked with general food items: peanut butter, jelly, milk, cereal, pasta, sandwich meats, cheese, fruit, veggies and condiments. When I sign over my rent check it isn't to some crazy landlord or a reality company but to a group of students that run the system. I get all of these wonderful things for about $1,500 cheaper per year than I did last year, and would HIGHLY suggest to any college goers that you look into your local CoOp systems, it is a wonderful way to live, and you meet so many fabulous new and different people.
Classes are far and away the most enjoyable ones I have had throughout my college career, it pays to be senior that is for sure. None of them start before 12pm (go ahead and call me lazy, I'm still waking up at 5:45am every day for rowing) and I have no Friday classes. My Senior Seminar is my most interesting course currently. A Senior Seminar is a James Madison capstone class that requires you to come up with original paper topic ideas with the semi-hope you might get published. I was originally signed up for a Sem about Cuba and Haiti but decided that, as wonderful as those two countries are, I have little to no interest in them. I asked my former Jews and Anti-Semitism Professor if there was anyway he would let me into his class and then tweak it a bit to fit my major (his Senior Seminar is for Social Relations and Policy people) and he agreed. I got the appropriate overrides and I'm now studying Social Relations within Nazi Concentration Camps. As bleak as it sounds, I find this topic terribly interesting and think it will serve me well if I am ever doing work with Humanitarian Aid or Genocide prevention groups. I also love my Professor and he has agreed to help me get published at the end of the year if I put a lot of work into it.
My next most interesting class would be Turkish. Thats right folks, I took my insane love of Turkey one step farther and am now learning the language (in case you hadn't picked it up with the greeting this email starts out with.) At this point I know the alphabet, numbers 1-40, days of the week, months of the year, and a super basic greeting conversation. My graduate student teacher is from Istanbul and can be a little hard to understand at times but since the class is only 6 people large I don't have a problem getting questions answered. :)
Next most important class would be my Islamic Empires class which is within the History Department and is teaching me the basis of Islam and the reigning empire from the 14th century through the 19th century. With my luck and some sort of divine providence my Professor is Turkish and would love nothing better than to hook me up with scholarships, and conversation groups in Turkish. She is a wonderful lady and I am looking forward to having a much better understanding of Islam at the end of the class. It is helpful that I am also reading the Qu'ran alongside the required course material. Fear not Grandma, I have no intention of converting anytime soon, but find that people are most scared of what they do not know, and I don't plan on being a cowardly person if I can help it.
I am also taking a voice class on the side for fun, but probably wont write much about it since it is super basic and not really worth noting. Might mean some classic performances for people around New Year's and Christmas. :)
The year is certainly starting off with a bang and I would have it no other way. I'm dealing with Graduate school applications as well as looking for a summer internship in a Human Rights group, or with the State Department (if anyone has any connections and wants to help me out, please let me know!) All in all the motto of the year is: productivity or die. Its going to be a good time :)
Hoşçakal! (H-oh-sh-ch-ah-kal)
Love, Claire
Friday, April 30, 2010
So I know its been forever, and this isn't going to be very long because I have to sleep, but I should be able to be on top of things better once I get done with school. In a nutshell:
Might be working as a camp counselor this summer at...STAR WARS & HARRY POTTER CAMPS!!!
Signed up for a 24 hour bike challenge today which is exactly what you probably think it is...I am crazy
Going to nationals in two weekends, think I could do a really good job
Still dating Zach and very much enjoying myself in the process
Beautiful dreams!
~Singing Ginger
p.s. this blog will turn into a training log once I get going on the bike thing.
Might be working as a camp counselor this summer at...STAR WARS & HARRY POTTER CAMPS!!!
Signed up for a 24 hour bike challenge today which is exactly what you probably think it is...I am crazy
Going to nationals in two weekends, think I could do a really good job
Still dating Zach and very much enjoying myself in the process
Beautiful dreams!
~Singing Ginger
p.s. this blog will turn into a training log once I get going on the bike thing.
Monday, February 22, 2010
Change
I need change.
I don't know if its the fact that I have been in school for too long, or having to work for around 16 hours a week all year, or that I am so sick of erging I could pull my hair out, but I need some change. The typical "I think I will pierce something" is not going to cut it this time around because I feel like too much of what I need to change is a settings thing. I don't want to be here, I want to be somewhere else. I don't want to be going to the classes I have (accept the Jewish one), my professor's are getting under my nails, and the team (though I love them with everything that I have, are driving me nuts.
It is sad that in order to get through my Political Islam class I am having to map out possible road trips I can take this summer. I just don't want to be here any more. I want to get out and have an adventure, and not that I don't love the adventure's I have with my newly minted boyfriend (did I mention I am seeing someone?) but going to Meijer to buy Battle Ship is only going to keep me happy for so long. When I get feelings like this its how I know that International Relations was the place for me. I might be a homebody but I need to get the heck out of here!!!!
Whats worse is that my political Islam class is now talking about Turkey and places that I have been, and history I already know about. I want to travel! I want to do something! The snow is making me go insane, not that i don't love snow but just because it is winter, and its cold and I can't just go outside and look up at the sky...because its cold and wet. Maybe I will go snowboarding this sunday, I don't know, I just need to get out. Not only my apartment, but this state and this school (if you can even call it that, since it is more like a business than anything else, but that is a rant for another day.)
Oi...
~The Singing Ginger
I don't know if its the fact that I have been in school for too long, or having to work for around 16 hours a week all year, or that I am so sick of erging I could pull my hair out, but I need some change. The typical "I think I will pierce something" is not going to cut it this time around because I feel like too much of what I need to change is a settings thing. I don't want to be here, I want to be somewhere else. I don't want to be going to the classes I have (accept the Jewish one), my professor's are getting under my nails, and the team (though I love them with everything that I have, are driving me nuts.
It is sad that in order to get through my Political Islam class I am having to map out possible road trips I can take this summer. I just don't want to be here any more. I want to get out and have an adventure, and not that I don't love the adventure's I have with my newly minted boyfriend (did I mention I am seeing someone?) but going to Meijer to buy Battle Ship is only going to keep me happy for so long. When I get feelings like this its how I know that International Relations was the place for me. I might be a homebody but I need to get the heck out of here!!!!
Whats worse is that my political Islam class is now talking about Turkey and places that I have been, and history I already know about. I want to travel! I want to do something! The snow is making me go insane, not that i don't love snow but just because it is winter, and its cold and I can't just go outside and look up at the sky...because its cold and wet. Maybe I will go snowboarding this sunday, I don't know, I just need to get out. Not only my apartment, but this state and this school (if you can even call it that, since it is more like a business than anything else, but that is a rant for another day.)
Oi...
~The Singing Ginger
Monday, February 8, 2010
Life Philosophy
So things have been a bit hectic over the past few weeks. Meeting new people, creating new relationships and trying to maintain old ones. All of this while rowing, working and schooling, which seems to the be the constant trinity in my life. It has been a wee bit dramatic, which also seems to happen when I deal with slightly more emotional situations than normal. Here is what I have come to by way of reflection on myself.
I am a highly passionate individual. I feel and experience the things in my world with much fervor and great depth. This in turn causes me what most would refer to as "drama" I don't cut people out of my life easily, I don't shut myself away to helping people with their issues or letting people, on the occasion, help me with mine. I don't keep things to myself and I am horrifically open. This blog would be a testament to that, I am writing out my thoughts are releasing them to the access of the entire world (accept maybe China :)) without reserve, for the most part. Because of all of these things, I have drama, and I am often around drama. Up until this point I truly thought that this was something I needed to work on and get rid of, but I think I might be changing my tune.
In order to cut drama from my life, I would have to cut certain people out. Not going to happen. My friends are wonderful, even when they are dramatic, and I like the complexity and diversity that comes along with each and every one of them. I would have to stop letting people vent to me, which in turn gets me stressed about their problems. I like helping people and getting them through things and making them happy, which means saying "no" doesn't happen often. I would have to keep some things to myself. To be honest, at this point in my young life, keeping things to myself just isn't going to happen, I tell people things, I vent and bitch and whine, and that is part of how I deal with things. And finally i would have to shut myself off to being an open person. This would be the biggest issue because I like sharing myself with people, I like letting my passions be known to the world, I like painting with my own shade of color.
I am a passionate individual and I would have it no other way. I feel and express and emote in big, loud, overbearing ways, and that is how I like it.
Now, don't get me wrong, there are things I need to work on doing that are not going to change me as a person that have the ability to cut down the drama. And also understand, that there is good drama and bad drama and just because I accept that a byproduct of my personality is drama doesn't mean I like marinating in it forever and ever.
So I will take on the drama. I will accept and welcome the beauty that comes with the depth and complexity of human emotion in all its forms. I will try and eliminate it where I can, but when it comes my way I will realize that in order to live my big passionate life, that this will be an effect, and I will welcome it with open arms.
Hope everything is coming up roses!
~The Singing Ginger
I am a highly passionate individual. I feel and experience the things in my world with much fervor and great depth. This in turn causes me what most would refer to as "drama" I don't cut people out of my life easily, I don't shut myself away to helping people with their issues or letting people, on the occasion, help me with mine. I don't keep things to myself and I am horrifically open. This blog would be a testament to that, I am writing out my thoughts are releasing them to the access of the entire world (accept maybe China :)) without reserve, for the most part. Because of all of these things, I have drama, and I am often around drama. Up until this point I truly thought that this was something I needed to work on and get rid of, but I think I might be changing my tune.
In order to cut drama from my life, I would have to cut certain people out. Not going to happen. My friends are wonderful, even when they are dramatic, and I like the complexity and diversity that comes along with each and every one of them. I would have to stop letting people vent to me, which in turn gets me stressed about their problems. I like helping people and getting them through things and making them happy, which means saying "no" doesn't happen often. I would have to keep some things to myself. To be honest, at this point in my young life, keeping things to myself just isn't going to happen, I tell people things, I vent and bitch and whine, and that is part of how I deal with things. And finally i would have to shut myself off to being an open person. This would be the biggest issue because I like sharing myself with people, I like letting my passions be known to the world, I like painting with my own shade of color.
I am a passionate individual and I would have it no other way. I feel and express and emote in big, loud, overbearing ways, and that is how I like it.
Now, don't get me wrong, there are things I need to work on doing that are not going to change me as a person that have the ability to cut down the drama. And also understand, that there is good drama and bad drama and just because I accept that a byproduct of my personality is drama doesn't mean I like marinating in it forever and ever.
So I will take on the drama. I will accept and welcome the beauty that comes with the depth and complexity of human emotion in all its forms. I will try and eliminate it where I can, but when it comes my way I will realize that in order to live my big passionate life, that this will be an effect, and I will welcome it with open arms.
Hope everything is coming up roses!
~The Singing Ginger
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
What the Heck?
So I thought I had everything figured out...and then I didn't. I guess the only thing I can ever be sure of is that I will never be sure of anything. I promise, within the next week I will let you know. It has something to do with my love life, and I think it is going to be a good thing.
On another hand: started the weight loss supplement "Alli" yesterday. Going to try this out and thought i would be up front and honest with any readers and let you know how everything goes. That way you are left with some options a.) if it is something you were thinking about doing, I will try it out first and you can get some information on it. b.) you can laugh at any odd reactions I might have to it (and there are some possible side effects if I end up falling off the wagon) or c.) you can be jealous when my body turns into that of a super model over the course of a couple weeks. :)
So far it has been fine, a little stomach upset but that is about it. For sure makes me think about what I am about to eat just because I have to pop a little blue pill before every meal. I have a little online account thingy too, my first check in will be on tuesday. I will also try and keep up with tracking my weight loss on here.
Weight Lost to Date: 0lbs (though I guess it could be something since I haven't actually weighed myself today...but who knows)
Hope everything is coming up roses!
~The Singing Ginger
On another hand: started the weight loss supplement "Alli" yesterday. Going to try this out and thought i would be up front and honest with any readers and let you know how everything goes. That way you are left with some options a.) if it is something you were thinking about doing, I will try it out first and you can get some information on it. b.) you can laugh at any odd reactions I might have to it (and there are some possible side effects if I end up falling off the wagon) or c.) you can be jealous when my body turns into that of a super model over the course of a couple weeks. :)
So far it has been fine, a little stomach upset but that is about it. For sure makes me think about what I am about to eat just because I have to pop a little blue pill before every meal. I have a little online account thingy too, my first check in will be on tuesday. I will also try and keep up with tracking my weight loss on here.
Weight Lost to Date: 0lbs (though I guess it could be something since I haven't actually weighed myself today...but who knows)
Hope everything is coming up roses!
~The Singing Ginger
Sunday, January 31, 2010
Because I Will Always Rather Fall
Let myself do and think something stupid, I don't know if I am ever going to learn, but I wouldn't change myself ever. Promise this will be the last cryptic post for a while, sometimes I just have to vent to something other than my journal.
~The Singing Ginger
~The Singing Ginger
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
Things That Make me Happy
I thought it might be nice to share these with you, they make me happy, so I hope they do the same for you.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1vupEpNjCuY
http://vimeo.com/8400913
Hugs
~The Singing Ginger
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1vupEpNjCuY
http://vimeo.com/8400913
Hugs
~The Singing Ginger
Saturday, January 23, 2010
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
Oh the Possibilities
Things that Freak me Out:
-Discovering bugs that are crawling on me that I didn't know were there (but not bugs in general, nor bugs I know about.)
-Losing friends
-The idea that with all this cooking I have been doing at some point I am going to have to know how to put out a kitchen fire
-Little kids being hurt
-Accidentally touching gum that has been put under a chair or desk I am at and has been there for Lord knows how long
-Failure, in all its shapes and forms
-The idea of Ginger's dying out as a race (yes, I said a race)
-And finally (though this is by no means a total list) feeling like I am going to let someone down, or fall short of who they think of me as a person.
This last one is going to be the topic of today's posty thing. I have recently been getting to know this amazing and wonderful person who's name for the purpose of this post is going to be...Hoody. So Hoody and I have met a couple of times, but have only really started getting to know each other by talking though Skype. Hoody doesn't live where I do, and so this, texting and phone calls are the best means of communication. When I say "getting to know" what I mean is having wonderfully long conversations through our computers every night for the past week and a half that usually run between 2 and 4 hours. Hoody is a cool dude.
Situation: Hoody and I would really like to see each other in person, since the last time that happened was quite a while ago and we haven't seen each other since this whole thing started. Problem: I am worried that I am not going to be nearly as impressive in person as I am over the computer. Now, don't get me wrong, I am totally confident that I am a cool person. I have done a lot of things that people my age...hell people not my age, have never done. I know I am interesting and have a lot of things to share. My issue is that sometimes that doesn't come out right away when I meet people for the first time, and sometimes I can be awkward and weird and fidgety and odd and I don't know, a million other kind of things that are anything but easy going, impressive and normal. I have already accepted the fact that I am going to end up putting my foot in my mouth at least a dozen times when we first meet, and since simply not opening my mouth to say anything has been ruled out (though I am still pondering about whether or not this would be feasible) I am, at this point, trying to do a preemptive damage control type thing.
Shoot, okay need to go to practice. But i am going to finish this post when I have time and will post as is for now, so anyone with any advice can let me know.
~The Singing Ginger
-Discovering bugs that are crawling on me that I didn't know were there (but not bugs in general, nor bugs I know about.)
-Losing friends
-The idea that with all this cooking I have been doing at some point I am going to have to know how to put out a kitchen fire
-Little kids being hurt
-Accidentally touching gum that has been put under a chair or desk I am at and has been there for Lord knows how long
-Failure, in all its shapes and forms
-The idea of Ginger's dying out as a race (yes, I said a race)
-And finally (though this is by no means a total list) feeling like I am going to let someone down, or fall short of who they think of me as a person.
This last one is going to be the topic of today's posty thing. I have recently been getting to know this amazing and wonderful person who's name for the purpose of this post is going to be...Hoody. So Hoody and I have met a couple of times, but have only really started getting to know each other by talking though Skype. Hoody doesn't live where I do, and so this, texting and phone calls are the best means of communication. When I say "getting to know" what I mean is having wonderfully long conversations through our computers every night for the past week and a half that usually run between 2 and 4 hours. Hoody is a cool dude.
Situation: Hoody and I would really like to see each other in person, since the last time that happened was quite a while ago and we haven't seen each other since this whole thing started. Problem: I am worried that I am not going to be nearly as impressive in person as I am over the computer. Now, don't get me wrong, I am totally confident that I am a cool person. I have done a lot of things that people my age...hell people not my age, have never done. I know I am interesting and have a lot of things to share. My issue is that sometimes that doesn't come out right away when I meet people for the first time, and sometimes I can be awkward and weird and fidgety and odd and I don't know, a million other kind of things that are anything but easy going, impressive and normal. I have already accepted the fact that I am going to end up putting my foot in my mouth at least a dozen times when we first meet, and since simply not opening my mouth to say anything has been ruled out (though I am still pondering about whether or not this would be feasible) I am, at this point, trying to do a preemptive damage control type thing.
Shoot, okay need to go to practice. But i am going to finish this post when I have time and will post as is for now, so anyone with any advice can let me know.
~The Singing Ginger
Friday, January 8, 2010
Trouble
Question to the masses: when you are about to make a bad decision, and you see it coming and it is ENTIRELY within your power to change it, and keep yourself out of trouble...but you don't particularly want to; what do you do?
~The Singing Ginger
~The Singing Ginger
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
Accidental Day Off
Making almond crusted chicken for my co-workers since I have been promising them a meal for a while. Just put it in the oven. I think I am going to start including the recipes for all these things because it will make the blog look more involved. Will let you know how it turned out in a little while. Will also add the recipe, later.
~The Singing Ginger
~The Singing Ginger
Friday, January 1, 2010
First Post of 2010
Just wanted to get on real quick and wish everyone a Happy New Year and that I hope every one's celebrations went well. I am currently in Canada with the family and trying to soak up every moment of what could very possibly be one of the last New Year's I send up here. Coming back to day and, time permitting, will be cooking Swedish meatballs for my friend Ski. I would post something about that here, but I can already tell you they are going to be amazing, and they aren't so hard to make that I worry about it all that much.
On another culinary note: I made a key lime parfait thingy for a reunion I had with my high school accapella group. It turned out okay, the custard went very well actually but the recipe called for a layer of graham cracker crumbs between the custard and the whipped cream and I think it ended up making things a bit too dry. I might mix it with a bit of something to moisten it next time around, though everyone seemed to like it just fine.
Alrighty, going to go have an early dinner. May the first few days of the new year be happy and restful and may the memories of the year past be learned from.
~The Singing Ginger
On another culinary note: I made a key lime parfait thingy for a reunion I had with my high school accapella group. It turned out okay, the custard went very well actually but the recipe called for a layer of graham cracker crumbs between the custard and the whipped cream and I think it ended up making things a bit too dry. I might mix it with a bit of something to moisten it next time around, though everyone seemed to like it just fine.
Alrighty, going to go have an early dinner. May the first few days of the new year be happy and restful and may the memories of the year past be learned from.
~The Singing Ginger
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