Pots of Tea

So I have found that my new kick, as of being sick for the past week or so, has been tea. I have the feeling I am turning into a bit of a hipster as I sit here in a flannel shirt I bought at a thrift store, working on my laptop that is covered in, what one friend described as "hippie stickers," sipping on a pot of vanilla tea (which wasn't all the good truth be told) at espresso royale, while listening to part of the soundtrack of "Where the Wild Things Are", and updating my blog...oh yeah, the hipster is bleeding forth from my eyeballs. I think it is probably just another phase. I have realized that, that is kind of how people function; and my hypothesis, contrary to popular belief, would be that this is how people of all ages function and live.

I associate different phases of my life with music, clothing and people. Each phase has a different anthem, a different t-shirt, and different hang out, and when the phase is over I have all of these relics to look back on and jog memories. I think it is beautiful. There is nothing wrong with change, we are constantly changing and it would only make sense that our tastes and hobbies would do so along with us. Each phase of life requires something different from our surroundings and being the adaptable species that we are we take what we have around us and utilize what this "section" of life requires. Currently I have 11 piercings (oh yeah...I got another one) and am scheduled for a tattoo in December, but I hold no delusions that when the time comes I will let the holes in my head heal and move on (the tattoo gets to sick around forever but I am hoping that my old saggy self will be able to enjoy it, if not love it.) My theory on why I get things pierced (other than the really cute guy who works in the shop named Andy) would be that I require occasional change in my appearance that I can control. I also require some semblance of being unique and this is my way to express that. You might at this point be thinking that I am a "poser" and that I should go back to my Ann Arbor bubbble and write slam poetry; but "frankly my dear, I don't give a damn," it makes me happy, and if that makes me a poser let me only say that I will be posing for life!

Here is what I say...screw it, here is what I shout: do what makes you happy. If that means punching holes in your face, or rushing a sorority, or playing a sport, or singing in a glee club, do it. You don't have time to be unhappy, you don't have time to be sad, you don't have time to think about what you might have done had you not been too scared to do it. If your friends laugh, and ridicule you, find new friends, there are plenty to be had and people are so different that I have doubt in your ability to find others that, like you, who are seeking their happiness in some "lame" way that nobody understands. There are going to be enough parts of your life that are going to make you unhappy that you have no control over. You are going to have jobs you don't like, you are going to have to be around people that agitate the hell out of you, and there are a million other things that are just part of living that are going to put you down, depress you and make you want to curl into the fetal position and never wake up in the morning. You can't escape these things, you can't change them and they are going to put gray hairs on your head no matter what. No one is perfectly happy, so through the idea that you have to be out the window. But the things you DO have control over, don't make them the unhappy moments of your life.

Okay I am stepping off the soap box now, I know everything I say is easier said than done, but I hope it might give people food for thought.

Yours Always,
~The Singing Ginger

Hope (Not just an Obama Thing)

Hope is a dangerous, dangerous thing.

Hope can keep alive the spirits of millions but can also spur on a lag in life that will put you at a stand still because you are living in a hope that will never be realized. Hope has kept me after guys that I should have been over much more quickly, hope also got me through the cancer and eventual death of one of my best friends, hope keeps me going everyday when I find that my existence has amounted to very little and I don't think I am going anywhere with my life. Hope is a dangerous thing because, to be frank, we have to learn that giving it up is not always a bad thing. Sometimes giving up hope means moving on with life, means new beginnings, means being able to make room to hope for something else. Hope is a dangerous thing.

And what happens when your lack of hope has been a protection mechanism? When you have made the conscious decisions not to hope for something because you knew that there was no way it could be yours? That you were satisfied with just not hoping because it meant that you had more space in your head to think? That functioning was not depending on hope but the lack of it? And what happens when that thing becomes a far off distant possibility? How does one deal with that? Hope does one deal with the surprising presence of hope? Hmmmmmm...I will get back to you.

~The Singing Ginger

Pictures

So I have actually been doing what I said I was going to do for a while now (big surprise there) and have been taking more pictures which is fun. I need to find my little camera cord thing so I can post the best ones for all of you beautiful people. I am hoping to possibly take the camera to the next rowing practice and gets some pictures on the water. Not only would these be gorgeous because the involve water in the early morning sunlight, but then you all can get a visual on why I love the grace of this sport so much.

Speaking of rowing I had a 5k test this morning. I still rank top 3 for the women...but that isn't the top so I still have work to do. A good friend of mine asked why I row the other day and I finally got a chance to vocalize why I love this sport so much; it went a little something like this:


"I love rowing firstly because it is on the water and that all in of its own is calming but also because when you are on an erg or racing on the water there is only you and that one thing. There is only the next 500 or 200 or 100 meters and the only thing stopping you is yourself. Because it tears your body apart and pushes you closer to your physical boundaries than you ever thought you could go. You have no idea how far you can push your body until you have taken it over the edge, then take it back a half inch and that is where you have to go every time you race. My body is so much more rugged than I ever though it would be, and it can handle so much more stress than I thought possible. Rowing helps me realize this, it is a challenge and a constant competition and its so pure in how it goes about doing all of these things.
You are accountable for yourself and your boat and when everything comes down to the line the stronger better rowers will always win. There isn't any way a ref or a guideline or rule, or call can change that. And the lows are so low because if you did it right you can empty yourself entirely and still lose to that other, better team; but the highs...god the highs are amazing because you can't stand or breathe or see straight but through the pain, and there is SO much pain, your body is ringing knowing that it has conquered all.
And then there is the last part, the part where I don't have to think about ANYTHING when I am rowing. It is just me and the water and the boat and the screaming voice of the coxswain and I don't have to think about school or work or the loneliness or any of the other shit that clouds my mind every other second of the day. For that 2 hours all there is, is the boat and my team mates and the water. I don't have to think about anything else, and nothing else comes into my mind. And when we are doing test pieces, even though they suck, all there is to concentrate on is how you are going to get your body through the next couple of minutes without it shutting down. There is just nothingness, and I get to swim in it."

So yeah, if anyone is every wondering why the hell there are these crazy cult people that love the pain and the spandex and the early practices, try it, because everyone has a crazy cult member in them somewhere.

On a note that is a bit more applicable to the title of this blog: I am going to be auditioning for a talent show with a $1,000 cash prize. I am going to sing my heart out for this so much more than anything else because I REALLY NEED THE MONEY! It would take care of rent, and debt to my parents, and bills, and the tattoo I want to get and I could put some away to use for text books and road trips and any other crazy adventure I might find myself wanted to do on a rainy day.

Cutting an album with Erik, should be fun, I am excited.

Hope everything is coming up roses.
~The Singing Ginger

I'm Back!

Hello wonderful internet peoples. Sorry it has been WAY too long since I have last posted. Life has been a bit hectic. I am trying to get my study abroad papers done, as well as moving into the new apartment, getting back into school, starting a new job and of course rowing. I am happy to report that the last Bastille of resistance to the crew movement in my family (my little brother) has fallen and now my entire 5 person family rows. It is actually kind of sad, but I enjoy it all the same.

This might be where people are thinking I am going to go into what I learned while away but to be quite honest I don't really feel like doing that right now, so you will just have to hold your breath and come back another time. I promise I will post one at some point.

On a cooler note, since I don't have enough going on in my life right now, I think I am going to take (at the suggestion of my fabulous photographer friend JD) on a little project. One of my goals for the year is to take more pictures and hopefully better ones as well. In order to work on this in an active manner, once I get back I am going to start taking about 30 random pictures a day and then post the one that best represents the day on here. Even if I don't do a text post that day the pic will still be on here. I am going to try and start this up as soon as I can mostly because it sounds like a blast, we will see how long it lasts.

Hope everything is coming up roses!

~The Singing Ginger

OMGOMGOMG!!!

So I made it to Paris, the city I was MOST looking forward to visiting on this trip and I have to say it has yet to disappoint. I spent the day on a 3 hour, free, walking tour held by neweurope (most amazing tours ever if you go to a big city in europe) and saw: Notre Dame, Eiffel tower, arc de triomphe, Louvre, Muse de Orsay, Latin quarter, Saint Michel and a bunch of other really cool parisian sites. After that I took a 20min walk from where the tour ended to the Eiffel tower (since we didn't get very close) and chilled out there for a bit but didn't have the chance to go up since I didn't really want to wait in line for 3 hours, by myself, in the rain. And this is where I shot myself in the foot...

As you can image, after a 3 hour walking tour and another walk to and from Eiffel I was kind of tired. I was going to just take a nap for an hour and then head over and go into the Louvre because it is free for students after 6pm on fridays. Well I guess my body was calling for a bit more sleep than that because I ended up taking a 2 hour nap and waking up too late to be able to go out. That is the sad thing about traveling alone, I don't have anyone to go out with and therefore don't feel comfortable leaving the hostel late at night to explore. Because I missed the Louvre tonight I am going to try and go tomorrow. This also means that tomorrow looks a little crazy: wake up, go to Muse De Orsay, take a walking tour of Monmartre, meet Avery at 6:30 for mass at Notre Dame, go to Louvre with Avery?, try and convince Avery to go have a glass of wine with me somewhere, go to bed. Then on Sunday: wake up, meet Jeffry at Catacombs and go on tour, go to Champs de Eleyse to watch the end of...TOUR DE FRANCE!!! So excited, even though Lance isn't gonig to win. Since I will be down there I am going to round out my stay with the Arc de Triomphe and I think that covers pretty much everything. Next time I come back here I think I am going to do the non touisty side of Paris, but for now I am content being a camera wielding, gitty American.

Home in less than a week. I love and miss you all and will update about school when I get back to the flat. :)

-Claire

p.s. Look below for a post I just published that I began writing before Paris.

2nd Wind

Hello everybody! I am back from Prague and it was exactly what I needed to really ward off the homesickness that has been plaguing me for a while. Prague is amazing; it is everything that anybody you has ever told you about it. It was nice traveling alone as well simply because moving in large groups can be a little stressful/ dramatic/ inefficient for doing the things that I want to do. And we all know that the world revolves around me :)

Anyways, on a slightly different topic, in efforts to update all you wonderful people on life here across the puddle (and you are going to have to forgive me but I am not going to deal with loading pictures until a later date so for now it is just going to be text...sorry)this has been what has been on the up-and-up.

Fields trips:
-NATO Headquarters: Went to the NATO Headquarters just outside of Brussels and got to be a part of a Terrorist Attack drill that happened to fall on the the day we there and about 10mins into the presentation we were being given. We also got to meet the 3 star Admiral that represents the US at NATO. I could give you his name but I don't have it on me and will look it up later and add it. http://www.navy.mil/navydata/bios/navybio.asp?bioID=276

-European Council: This woman (again I have no names on me and will add them later) was amazing and I want to BE here. She is the representative for President Solano when it comes to Human Rights and is also a former James Madison student. She talked about how EU uses certain avenues in order to improve aspect of human rights on a global scale. I will want her job if I decide to enter a more political sphere.

-European Parliament: Again another great speaker, this time a civil servant who was working on public relations for the EU at the time. Not a high mucky muck but a really great speaker and a wonderful guy. He ended up giving his presentation on general EU stuff and how it functions (WAY too many sub groups to be productive.) But the question and answer secession was interesting and long and in depth and he knew a lot more than he was letting on when he was presenting and I think he was surprised by the knowledge we had through the questions we were asking.

-SHAPE: This was cool because our "guide" was a two star colonel from Poland. Great guy. We also had a panel made of him, a colonel from Ireland and a representative from the US. We got to ask them questions and then answer from their different view points. Best part of this visit was when the Irish colonel and the US colonel almost got into a fist fight when Wes asked them about using private security forces in Iraq. It was hilarious and all of us learned a lot from it. I had the sense to sit across from our Polish colonel during lunch and we got to talking about life and politics and culture. He liked me I think because he said I should come work at SHAPE and that it would be a good place for me and gave me some reading on it. I would say I could use him for a job but he is retiring off to his yaht in Poland in about a month.

-European Commission: Okay this one was boring, no lie. We got a general overview of the Maghreb (Northern African countries) and the EU's relations. He ended up throwing us scripted answers to our slightly more controversial questions and I wasn't so much into it.

Yeah, write more later, be back soon. Love you all!

~Claire

In Short

Okay, so in short I have been sick with a nasty cold for the past two days. That plus countless interviews and meetings with people arranged by the program, a 1500 word essay to write, a weekend trip to plan, and the fact that I have some serious homesickness going on has, and will continue until next week, prevented me from posting. Sorry guys, I just need a break and attempt to figure out how to recharge my batteries when all I am wanting right now is home. Love you all. Hope everything is coming up roses.

~Claire
p.s. maybe this weekend in Prague will do me good.